B&E

Last night after Vero got off of work we headed to her new pad to unpack some things.

First stop was her new roommate Mel’s place as she had the two keys to the new place. She will be moving her stuff this coming Saturday.

We get to the place and Vero inserts the key and tries to turn the lock but nothing is moving. Then she realizes that she can’t get the key out.

I try to attempt to jostle it from its place but this thing is wedged in there tight! It can only turn so much and it doesn’t even have one ounce of wiggle room when trying to pull it out. Clearly we are victim to a Wal-Mart key cutting experience. 😉

While I try and pull out my superhuman strength to remove this key, Vero goes downstairs to the superintendent and he grabs some tools and tries to remove it himself but it isn’t working.

Then, out of nowhere a police officer pulls up!

Officer: “Uh, what’s going on here?”
Vero: “Our key is stuck in the lock.”
Officer: “Do you live here?”
Vero: “Yes, we just rented the place this week.”
Officer: “Oh thank God, I thought this was a Break and Enter!”

Here I am with this giant smile on my face of the sheer hilariousness of this situation. The police officer had to call off her backup also. After taking some information down she was gracious enough to find some locksmith phone numbers and give them a call but she said they either were on the other line or busy.

At this point, I would like to thank the Ottawa Police for the kind service they provided in our predicament. When I think of police, I suppose I think of ‘movie’ police and how they are only interested in crimes, but she was kind enough to not leave us high and dry. Kudos to you.

So after she leaves, I head down to the bowling lane to use the pay phone. This is where my night hit an all-time peak.

Now, if you don’t know who Salad Fingers is, it’s this very insane character found in some animation clips on the Internet. It’s not for the weak of heart but if you’re interested, Google and watch some Salad Fingers episodes. I personally find him hilarious.

So I walk in the bowling lane and use the phone but to no avail so I grab some change from the cashier. On my way to the cashier’s desk I see these two teenage girls. One is walking, talking and just acting weird and the other is filming her with her digital camera. I then realize that she is imitating Salad Fingers! Awesome!

On my way back from the cashier’s desk they are eyeing me up and acting like Salad Fingers while taping it and they just want to see my reaction (which, if no one would know what the heck she is doing, they would probably think she was disturbed.).

Me: “Wow, cool. Salad Fingers!”
Them (mouths gaped open in shock/awe): “YOU KNOW SALAD FINGERS?!”
Me: “Yes, of course. Who doesn’t?”

I then walk away and let them revel in the fact that they aren’t the coolest cats on Earth. I am.

Locksmiths don’t pan out (where’s the 24 hour locksmith when you need him?) so Vero breaks the key so no one could get into the place (I say potentially considering we couldn’t even get into it) and we head home.

While I know Vero was disappointed in the night as she had high hopes for unpacking, I must admit that I thought the night was hilarious and you have to enjoy these random nights when they come your way. Especially when someone is doing an impression of Salad Fingers.