Invitation Lost in the Mail

My buddy Paul had a housewarming party in Toronto. I found out about it via some friends a week before the event so I already had plans to go to the States but if I had known about it when the original invite went out, I would have went up for the rip-roaring good time.

So I email Paul and kindly mention to him that he should think about a simple email to yours truly instead of depending on Facebook because…heck…I just don’t have a Facebook account!

Here is his reply:

Sorry man. Why don’t you just join the 21st century and get a facebook
account?

🙂

You would have been invited had you been on the fb.

Now, I’ve already given Paul the heads up that I shall be ranting on this very subject right here in Palmer’s World and that he should not take too much offense. I’m just going to try and prove a point. No ill will and no friendships shall be scorned between the two of us. I also know that he’s joking in his communique.

I begin.

WHAT THE HECK?! So I have to sign up an account out in cyberspace to get an invite to a party? Blasphemy! This is quite the setback in social relations in the 21st century. Or is it a step forward? Do people actually not want to hang out with a lot of people and would rather sit in their room and chat to babes online all day long? Maybe that’s the case. Otherwise, I’m sure if I was really wanted to attend this party, I would have got an invite somehow or another.

I’m going to throw out Evite as an example as to how it’s a better system. Evite.com allows you to set up an invitation and send out the invite to anyone with an e-mail address and they can peruse the invite. Point 1 – If someone doesn’t have an email address (which…I couldn’t even fathom who wouldn’t, but it’s a possibility), I would call them up and invite them. Point 2 – There is this function on Evite which shows you if the invitation has been read or not. For my Christmas party, I’ll check out that list to see if there are any people who haven’t opened it and get in touch with them personally to see if they want to come.

It ain’t rocket science here people. Flash back to 1983 and I’m sure people were getting on the phone and saying “Come to my party.” (click).

I’m really not denouncing Paul here because let’s be honest here.

1. He’s in Toronto which in his mind may put me out there as a fringe friend who probably wouldn’t attend.
2. It’s not like he’s my brother or anything and this will start a family feud.

What I am denouncing is the lazy culture that the network of cyberspace has created. I am victim to it as well. I depend on email as a communication device. I depend on Evite as a communication device. These are not perfect systems, and someone can probably denounce Evite as an awful, impersonal invitation system as much as the Facebook invite system. It’s a manner of making things…simpler. It’s much easier to send out an electronic invitation instead of phoning up 30 different people. There goes my Sunday afternoon.

Somewhere along the line, we have lost the true meaning of social relations. It isn’t about the number of friends you have ticked off in your Facebook account. It’s not about the Number of ‘Yes, I shall attend your party’ you see in Evite. It’s about your friends looking for a good time and you are offering that good time.

My favourite line from Paul is “You would have been invited had you been on the fb.”. So does that mean that I wasn’t invited otherwise? Ha! I’m sure this is not what he meant. Paul is not a bad guy. But Facebook has become an exclusive club. “Join Facebook and you can come to our parties.” I feel like I am pressured to do drugs back in high school again and because I never did, I wasn’t in the club.

Time and time again, the same excuse comes out though. People don’t want to take blame for this error. So instead of saying “I am a moron. I can’t believe I didn’t think about inviting you.” they say “Well, isn’t this your fault for not having a Facebook account?”

I’m going to reiterate that I’m really not harping on Paul here. He just provides an excellent example of a few other instances in the past year of parties I’ve missed out on because I wasn’t part of the ‘club’. The same reason comes back all the time. “Well why aren’t you on Facebook?” Read between the lines on that one: It’s your problem. You want to go to the parties, you have to pay the price, and that price is signing up for Facebook.

You know what? Just this one time, I’ll take the blame. Yep, I’m the moron here. If I want to go see anyone badly enough, I should be signing up for Facebook. In fact, I’m part of the slacker culture that the Internet has bred. We’re all caught up in this web of ‘trading off social relations’ for ‘ease of use systems’. I suppose one could create an entire argument on the industrialization of society and how stuff just isn’t made with the same heart anymore as it’s just mass produced. It’s the same concept with the Internet. It’s just easier to use so who cares if a little thought goes out the window?

On that note, I am off to update my Evite for my Christmas party. 😉 I think I’ve just written myself up as a hypocrite in this entry. But I’m going to redouble my efforts to ensure that everyone I’ve invited at least knows about the party. This is something to keep in mind while using these ‘easy-to-use’ systems. You can’t just hit SEND and think your job is done.