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The Life of a Futurist

“Machines to out-think humans in 15 years, futurist predicts.” – This is a headline from an article in the Ottawa Citizen from a few years back when the movie Final Fantasy came out.

While the thought of that is ridiculous, I thought about this futurist that came up with this idea.

What the heck is a futurist? Is that an actual job? That is amazing! I want to be a futurist! Imagine me throwing out random hoopla from my brain and getting paid for it!

The best part about it is they have the security that is shared by the weatherman. Wazat? Weatherman predicts rain all day but it’s sunny? Man, he got it WRONG, but heck, let’s go outside and enjoy the day. No weatherman can lose their job even if they predict the weather wrong every day!

I bet this is the life of the futurist. Suuuure, we’re going to be run by machines in the future. Uh huh. Wait, what if it doesn’t happen? There should be a public stoning of this futurist since he made us give up technology in fear of the Matrix becoming a reality.

I can see some of the headlines I would come up with when I become a futurist:

  • Walt Disney will come back to life to entertain us all.
  • We will not need to leave the house in the future to go to work – we will teleport.
  • Pets out. Robodogs IN.
  • Hot dogs become #1 health item in Canada.

If anyone finds a job listing for a ‘futurist’, you know how to get in touch with me. This is my calling.

One reply on “The Life of a Futurist”

Three cheers for teleportation. Huzzah! Huzzah! Huzzah! This is definitely my most coveted superpower.

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